Mga Napahalagahan Kong Espiritwal na Hiyas

• Huwag ikumpara ang sarili sa iba, sa halip, magtuon ng pansin sa aking mga pananagutan. Ang pagkukumpara ng sarili sa iba ay magpapangyari lamang sa akin na magyabang o kaya ay mainggit. Lahat tayo, may pribilehiyo man o wala, ay may maringal na posisyon dahil ipinagkatiwala sa atin ang pinakamahalagang gawain sa buong lupa sa ngayon - ang gawaing pangangaral ng mabuting balita ng kaharian. (Galacia 6:3-4)
•  Hindi ako makapagpapakita ng pag-ibig kung ako ay walang kapakumbabaan. (Juan 13:34-35) 
• Tulad ng isang maibiging ama, palaging naghahanap si Jehova ng dahilan at pagkakataon para pagpalain ang patuloy na humihinging tapat sa kaniya. Higit si Jehova kung umibig kaysa sa sinumang ama na may likas na pagmamahal sa kaniyang anak. (Mateo 7:11)

I wonder, do I  subconsciously want to see you angry, ailing, or down in the mouth.

I have allotted some time for rehearsals, in case, in time, somewhere, when I have the time to finally fathom, you would not fathom.

Was I wearing my arrogant ego more often this time? I also think so. But my ego stayed when it was so utterly convenient to leave. I'd rather bare my soul and be more naked than ever than to live in your world of perpetual whys again.

--

See the bruises I got from helplessly chasing your light because you pursue bigger sun, and when you forgot about the little shadow that was me.

This is an invitation. Check my heart so tired and defeated and the little defiant badge at its door that says "I still remain wild". These flesh and pulse were the same refuge that healed your broken bones. But you could not come home. 

You were too bright but wilting suits me so well.

--

Don't you love how seemingly defenseless I could always be? And  that I can always still beat you despite it through and through....

THE PINTO EXPERIENCE~

My last (valid) adventure was about nature, arts, and architecture in Pinto Art Museum in Antipolo, Rizal. The plan was born from a whimsy desire to shoot and a thrilling longing to meet up pretty co-bloggers RV and Eva. After few postponements we finally had a mini-get-together/ mini-photoshoot.
 

Since I live in Cavite, it took me a couple of hours (and a lot of patience) to reach Rob Galleria in Ortigas where the three of us agreed to meet. The heavy traffic made me three-quarter of an hour late (and I wasn't really proud of myself blaming the traffic but) that left the two bonded a little longer in my delayed presence. If they would become best friends in the future, they would owe it to me. 

From Ortigas, we rode a van to Antipolo then a tricycle to reach Pinto. The weather wasn't cooperating that time because the moment we got out of the van, it started to drizzle.

Immediately after the entrance tickets (and a physical map, yes, you can be lost) were handed to us, the shooting began. I won't tell about me being reproved for changing clothes inside the museum because I didn't know it was kind of prohibited unless you allow yourself to be charged with photo shoot fees. And, I don't! (But I said it anyway)

Pinto is so beautiful like how everyone who had been there can attest to. Nothing new I could add up to, except that it was completely more satisfying when you see it in person. Here are some of the pictures my little Daisy (my camera's name with its humble specs) captured. My advance apologies, my photographs are either crappy or crappy.

Look at the exteriors! I love its overall unkempt quality that still radiates a cozy vibe!

Plants! Plants! Plants! I could think of a handful of persons to bring here for a full botanical indulgence. Ate Joey's mom is definitely one of them. And B also. ;)

If one day, I'd decide to be a parent, I kind of want it to be to twins. I am not really sure, though. 

Even the walls have architectural (?) keme! 

Rv, Eva, and I agreed that this is our room goal: a window as wide as its wall. So wide I had to be almost out  of  the room to capture it.

It would be so much cooler if visitors could swim here. But on a second thought, that's a stupid idea, too. Lols

Few things not shown here: succulents, lots of arts in all kinds, my favorite Pinto staples like the Man Losing Its Essence sculpture and the We Are The Kids Your Parents Warned You About graffito, AND my ultra favorite Forest Room! I also missed the jury-rigged bridge and a lot others that sends you the idea this will have a part two, a sequel!

I was using a point & shoot with all my photos and as much as I want to convince myself it gave justice to the place, it didn't, far more with the two gorgeous lasses I was with. So if I were to describe the two, this way I hope I won't fail,  Rv is the reserved type while Eva is the more amiable one--

Rv is true to her blog title - Chasing Adventure - completely. She jumps, strides, and enjoys with everything life has thrown to her. She can go backpack travel with places she has never known. She can make something out of ordinary things with her artistic hands. And she takes beautiful photographs that melt hearts. While Eva is the beautiful companion. She listened and commented attentively that made our conversation lively and our awkwardness at rest. She laughed at my silly jokes even it got sillier as the clock ticked. She almost, if not totally, lighted up the place with her beauty and radiance. And even though the traffic on our way home, was more terrible than heavily cheesed pizza, I was in relief to know I was with her.

Pinto is so much more than the photos and stories I've said. (I know you know that) It has a deeper purpose than aesthetics. It reveals the most core perceptions, beliefs, and realities of your society. It gives you much meaning beyond what you knew today, but like what I told Kuya Andy (the tour guide, I suck at proper first citation), you can't be too much like a sponge in your life. You must know how to filter, and how to prioritize. You can't have much as you want, that's greed. But you can enjoy if you knew balance. That's what Pinto is all about (well for me) - BALANCE.

There's still so many things I have to say, but forget it. My main point here is go visit Pinto and discover why you should support and widen your own tourism. 

Excess: The Pinto Art Museum entrance fee is 150php. According to Sir Andy, eating is not allowed while taking the tour but you can eat in a certain place prior to the trip just ask the Pinto staff. The Cafe there is run by Bizu, and was closed when we visited.

Disclaimer: The photograph feat. me above is Rv's. While the rest is mine. You can check RV and Eva's blogs for more photos :) You can also check my instagram account for other versions: cherrylisraindrops

Bethel Tour Round Deux

Whenever there is an invite or a plan to visit Bethel, I always oblige myself to join. B was asking why would I visit again since I'd been there more than a year ago. I want to answer him with "why on earth not" but I know he won't like it (and he's just probably jealous because he has not been there yet, haha) So why nga ba?

These were my observations aka reasons:

....Entering the gates of Bethel was like entering a new world; aside from the cleanliness of the place, the values I observed (which is not surprising because Christians live here) were far from the busy, uncaring world I left few steps behind. Respect, equality, and cleanliness were some of them.

....People who work here are called Bethelites and they are enjoying great privileges of  1) working as servants of the one and only true God, 2) being with their spiritual family 24/7, 3) having a peaceful and dignified workplace, and 4) knowing they have their time spent in the best way. I can't think of any "job" more dignified than what they have.

And I didn't have even just a single photo of them.  :(

...The whole place is already picture perfect, I deserved a selfie in it.

And it did happen! Thanks to Ate Joey's mom.

Philippine Bethel is located in Quezon City, near Fisher Mall. Everyone is welcome to tour our offices. For more information about Jehovah's Witnesses or if you want to request a bible study, go visit our official website.

2.0.1.3

Before this month had started, I tried to back read my online journals (even my notebooks), thinking I could find written somewhere between my unpublished ramblings or over-processed photos fragments of my 2013. And boy, did I disappoint myself more to read how I wrote the same thing last last year - about not being able to properly document/write the past 365 days, to the point that I couldn't even believe myself.

So I'm trying once again. To live a new period of existence. And this is my entry to officially proclaim that (virtual pinky) promise of trying to be as productive blogger as I can! (Note that I've mentioned "trying" thrice already, and I also know that no one's requiring me to blog as much as I could, but it's a matter of self-help to improve my so called writing skills and have some tangible material to slap my face to remind me how I screw my life! Eheh. Harsh)

Aside from graduating last year, landing my almost first job in Quezon City, and feeling so bitterly attached to heartbreaks from September to November, I can't remember anything significant about last year. See, how uneventful my life is. Or probably, I'd been subconscious for 12 months like I-was-there-but-I-wasn't-there-completely kind of thing, or maybe my brain seemed to undergo some kind of malfunction. Or maybe I was really unappreciative and sick. (see "perspective")

Whatever it was, it belongs to the past now. So I'm ready and very grateful I am still here. With my little faith in myself and strong confidence in Jehovah, I'm mentally prepared for this year to be a lot better. I'm turning 25 this July, that erased that small doubt of not taking my responsibility as a daughter/ elder sister/ friend/ Christian/ WOMAN seriously. And I'm happy to take it fully and charmingly. (Lol at charmingly)

I hope the same for you, my dear reader, I hope this finds you well and with a perspective of thankfulness.

P.S. This will serve as a reminder for me too, in days life would seem to slip from my hands, I shall not worry.

Instagram

Writing has lost it's friendly tie with me and visiting my blog put my disappointment on an all time high. But I never seem to drop that natural fascination to documenting every little fiber of my day through photographs. It has been relatively easy for me to shove all of them on my instagram account as my decadent laziness or seasonal disconcertion (whichever is favorable to the accused) requires a shorthand solution. And today tonight, I decided that its time for some of these pictures to make it onto my blog.

First photo: I have this collective term for books I quite dig; it's books of my genre. I don't know if this applies to others, but most of the books I liked, in some way, belong to a particular sameness I can identify as I make an in-depth understanding of them. One way or another, I always believe they belong to be read by me. Second photo: I visited my alma mater after almost a year; it's ambivalence at it's finest - the familiar coldness and the comfort of the green scenery against the bittersweet four years of my life. Ugh, how could it feel so just yesterday. Third photo: Did an elder sister duty by representing my parents for May. I have always been so hands-on with my sister since my mom passed away and I probably will until I 'm alive!

butterfly I found on my bed, posted it with a lovely line from Jane Eyre, nobody noticed
flowers in my mom's grave, a common flower in my place
my kitten's staring at me, his adorable look I failed to capture perfectly
"Do not be amazed at this, for the hour is coming in which all those in the memorial tombs will hear his voice and come out, those who did good things to a resurrection of life, and those who practiced vile things to a resurrection of judgment." Jehovah's promise to mama.
I felt the itch of dyeing my hair again. Not red this time. I want a dark Earth color.
A bright sunny day after Typhoon Haiyan (Yolanda) hit the country. I went preaching that day.
A photo of myself as I search for my identity - I was like "I am one of them"
My tita's backyard in Bicol, if you traverse that path it leads you to a stream.
Junk food week with my sister May. Way unhealthy!
Easy breezy lifestyle in the mountains. I wonder when will I ever come back again

If you wonder what's my instagram account. It's cherrylisraindrops. Those instagram peeps sure get the update as it happens, but it is really something else if I share it with you, my dear readers.

La Vie En Rose Sweets and life lately.

After two weeks straight of being absent in midweek and Sunday meetings, Ate Joey and I finally had a chance to talk two days ago. She asked me how was I doing, and it took me some time to realize that I hadn't been thinking lately about life (and why does that question need pondering! Arte ko.) and some more time to think about what to answer. My thoughts were all in a race. I wanted to be honest and concise as much as possible but I didn't want to disclose anything. Years have honed me to be really unintentionally secretive, I tell you. I told her I was fine, she knew it was a lie. Because the main reason why we were in front of each other was because I was pretty far from being fine. Geez, old scheme.

I saved all my worries and qualms for Ate Joey's indulgence alone. I don't know I just can't talk about personal stuff. It's unbearable.  But it's not fair to say that my life is all tears and rain. These were the positive things I should have told her.

• We tried print screening! Ace, Ks, and I were satisfied with the result but we're bothered by how our not-so-fine artistry challenged by design execution. Currently, we are restricted to making easy peasy lemon squeezy patterns only /google-ing where to find artistry and inspiration (See what is desperation)
• Our (mini)online shop is back after its (semi)hiatus with a new (mini)collection. Hooraayy! :) You can brighten my week by checking and buying some here: panacheonline. I also have my personal instagram, it's cherrylisraindrops. Shameless plug my arse. Haha. And lastly, I think this is the highlight of my week;
• I've finally met the beautiful Cara Funk! Gawd, I can't tell you how overwhelmed I was. She's just a darling with that face and sweet voice. Good thing, Ks was with me who isn't half supportive with everything I do, I seemed cool and smooth.

La Vie En Roses is Cara's sweets shop which is known for delightful macarons. It also sells cupcakes, cakes, and other pastries, and more that I should try out soon! One thing that makes her macarons special is Cara's uncontestable heart for it. It's like her personality in meringue made for us to taste. It's the magic of baking with art and effort poured to consistently remind us that life is good. No matter what kind of no-matter-whats we could think of. And for that I would always like Cara. She's just beyond amazing.

I wished I have made it clear how special her macarons are. If not, you better go and enjoy it yourself! And even if I made it clear, the essence of all my words would be defeated if you won't snag a bite, yes, just a bite until you unconsciously want to have a heaps of it. True story, that happened to me.

More random photographs before and after our meeting with Cara after the cut-

Cam Sur (August 11-13)

 

 

After 9 long lost years, I had set my foot to Bicol again. Since my mom died in 2003, visiting this place had been basically off my mind - far, obnoxious, pain-filled idea. This place had been everything I could associate to letting go, memories, goodbye, abandonment.  But 9 years wasn't lost to vanity, it catches up to hearts' desires and replace all these with better memories and acceptance. As I felt the air hugging me with that unusual coldness, I knew I was fine now. I was excited to reconnect with my mom's memories, my early childhood spent in mountains here, and her absence that brought me here again with this rosy feeling.

 

Everything was damp when we arrived in Tara, thanks to the drenching rains from Typhoon Labuyo, walking without knocking was made impossible. It was really muddy and slippery that you would wonder how I was able to take photos while walking. To satisfy your imagination, I did trip off and land on all fours on a muddy ground; my slippers were torn, legs were very sore from all the slipping and sliding and attempts to control. My sister (who surprised me because she pretty managed the tedious walking and all) was there to support me by laughing her lungs out before extending her hands. Except for my feelings being bruised by embarrassment, I wasn't seriously hurt though. :)

 

On the first day, we stayed in my tita's house in the barrio. It is surrounded by beautiful flowers, standing near a stream where I courageously took a bath twice. Hihi. At night, a baylihan was held. It was a disco-like party where boys ask girls to dance with them, in exchange, girls were expected to receive gifts - in any form - from them. I didn't go but I received something though.

On our second and last day, we visited my old folks, my mother's parents. They greeted us with smiles and tears and lots of heartfelt hugs. I saw my titos and titas and their children I've lost track of for years. It was a hell of catching up, I used my one week energy for an hour of lively, emotional conversations with them. Math says it wouldn't be enough to cover 9 years! But neither were millions of hours. We're just happy for everything.

 

 

Leaving was especially difficult for me, though. I held my tears which were so ready to fall when it's time to utter the inevitable goodbye to lolo and lola. I would have let it fall if I knew that they can manage to see me cry but no, I won't give them such feeling, so I gave them my warmest and sweetest hug instead and said adieu without looking back. Okay, I looked back when I knew that they wouldn't see me anymore. Then, I finally sobbed.

I am about to share more photos (even personal ones - pictures of my old folks and beautiful baby cousins) from my Bicol trip on my instagram account: cherryilsraindrops. Thank you for letting me share this! Jehovah God bless everyone! =)

Losing a job; winning you (How mawkish this title could get)

I lost my job five days ago, oh no, logic says, you cannot lose something you never have. So I didn't actually lose anything, I just didn't get what I thought I was supposed to have, and the reason why I felt like I've lost something was because I've had own it even before it was really mine. In that case, it is now then accurate to say I lost because I wasn't able to win something. I assumed victory and I missed it. See how I complicate things?

After a month stay in Quezon City, I am back to Cavite, with nothing but a bag full of dirty laundries and my-ever-so-dwindling self-confidence on the verge of vanishing. And the world wasn't even that unkind, yet it seemed that it had already knocked me down to the ground. Okay, I exaggerated (like again!). I admit, I wept for few minutes, but not entirely because I know that I will be soon reclassified to the unemployed, but, it is more of the idea of "not being of use" again. I assure you, if you're a human conscious of your existence, it is one dreading feeling to know you are somewhat, kind of, sort of, useless.

Well, but just like what my B said, my past so-called "achievements" won't be disregarded or forgotten only because I failed now, and there's still hope for me because the world won't end here, and  that I still have the chance to make things better, and you know what, I believe him.

Lately, he has been the only person that can pacify my nerves, the sun that warms every aspect of my life  (you all know where this is going but I'll tell it anyway). I have come to this point that I wanted dreamed of settling down - not that I already have this conviction that it will be us in the end - it is just that he makes me think like it is possible for me to be really with someone for a lifetime. I had already given up the thought that it could transpire ever in my life. But I was wrong. Well, it seems. 

Presently, I am trying to work at home. Disposing few of my clothes to earn some as I start from scratch. I'm all rosy about everything despite all these despites! I don't know where all of this positivity is coming from yet I am ready to start anew and I hope he won't get tired of being my little sunshine for until, umm, forever? Did I just really use that word?

My life is a breeze~

It is vain to say things in absoluteness, life goes like feelings that come so transient in existence, but lately, I have been absolutely enjoying this uncertainty and complexity of waiting.

Aside from the anxiety of spending too much time bonding with my family, and on occasion, giving myself a treat (eg. manicure & pedicure, petting my cats, traveling nearly & cheaply), my life has been as easy as taking candy from a baby (of course, exaggeration intended!). After graduating, I expected to feel a) ecstatic - never have to be pressured of deadlines, b) sad - will miss my school, c) confident to find the right job d) need a vacation - had been working hard. But B never actually happens. I never knew I could be pleased with this "crucial" time after years of studying, which I branded as the "soul-sucking waiting period".

I attended an interview once (but it didn't prosper as the company rules demanded me being available 24/7). Let me talk defensively but I am really taking the job hunt seriously without detaching from some of provisions I make (that includes operating only during "normal" working hours). I don't want to be a victim of materialistic enslavement - the error of this generation. Yet, I am excited to be on the grind, though most of you will assume that I don't know what I'm wishing for, I am utterly game for it even if in the end, I might miss loafing away  (worse regret working at all).

Being online doesn't come as delightful as it was before to me, too. I think despite considering my daily routine as humdrum activities, I find contentment in its premises. Secondly, I have a special friend who assures and entertains my female consciousness, he that completes the day. You don't know how that last line reeked of smiles and sparkles from my eyes. Haha. But as much as I wanted to disclose more, the uncertainty that I've said I've been enjoying earlier stymies me from enjoying it fully too. Ironies. But I know there is a great pleasure in waiting and even better things after it. 

I hope you employ the same cool perspective in whatever situation you are, kind readers, and possibly enjoy it too like I do! =)